Dear Queen Elizabeth


We the people of these United States of America wish to express our sincere sympathies on your divorce from the European Union.  We know we have been an unruly colony for some time now.  But, those were our rebellious adolescent years, and we have since grown up.  We are now ready to accept you as our Queen again.  We would very much like to come home to help you restore the British Empire, and resume our rightful place as Canada’s big brother and crown prince of the United Kingdom.  Would you please accept us back?  And, oh yeah, could you do it quickly before the next presidential election! 

God Save the Queen,

America

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